16 Comments
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Zeitenwandel's avatar

When I feel overwhelmed by the state of the world and my inability to make progress on an intellectual level, I throw myself into manual labor. There's always something to do in the garden—pulling weeds, feeding the chickens, walking the dog, playing soccer with the kids... All of this grounds me and clears my head. And yes, it also helps me not take myself and the world so seriously.

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The Horn Gate's avatar

Yea! That is what the walk is about. Trying to find a bit of slow reality in such a rushed and demanding world. The walk demands nothing, although sometimes I demand writing from my walk and it can become another chore…

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Sheree Shatsky's avatar

Same. The garden keeps me sane.

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Tyger AC's avatar

Why be in such a lugubrious mood when you can be a simpleton?

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Ben Walter's avatar

The exchange where you doubt the purpose of making your son study because “it all ends in failure” hit hard.

I’ve had some nauseous moments realizing that I will likely have to expose my future children to a system that deadens just so they’ll be “acceptable,” or “hirable.”

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The Horn Gate's avatar

yeah man… it’s tough as hell. I always look at my son and hate the idea of him having to go through the struggle of conformity: trying to deliver “success.” I wish to give him a different world, but what choice do I really have?

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Kameron Primm's avatar

Grateful for the fun glimpse at your bookshelves, the palpable insight, and the general excellence.

My son is also seven.

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The Horn Gate's avatar

Thanks Kameron! 7 is a funny age xD

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Dave's avatar

Beautifully written. That all really resonates with me. The existential dread and inertia. The feeling of needing to accomplish something, quashed by the realization that efforts towards “being seen,” in the extremely unlikely event of success, would be meaningless. The fluctuations between nihilism and just enjoying the ride. The struggling with the works of great thinkers beyond my ability to comprehend. The Asian wife turning off the air conditioning. Always!

The only aspect I don’t identify with is that, in the division of labor in my household, I take primary responsibility for yelling at our child for her poor math 😂

Well, for what it’s worth, I see you.

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The Horn Gate's avatar

I have two jobs so for all the wish I have to be there for my son usually I am too tired, my wife doesnt work so this is sort of her domain, although, with my limited energy, I do have to get involved a lot because I believe the way she does it is mistaken and toxic! xD

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Dave's avatar

On the plus side, the Chinese are good at math (it's a stereotype for a reason), so maybe there's something to the yelling and berating technique. I need to up my game. On the minus side, my daughter and her (mostly Chinese) friends are constantly rolling their eyes, sighing, and lamenting their "Asian moms!"

But good on you for putting out pieces like this despite your busy life. I read quite a bit but can't muster anything more than inane comments around here. I just can't find the time, energy, and motivation for substantive newsletter posts, though I recognize it would be beneficial to put more effort into working thoughts out in writing.

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lchristopher's avatar

*instant subscribe* you come well recommended. +1

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The Horn Gate's avatar

really?? That’s awesome. I wonder who 🤣 Thanks for the sub buddy! I’ll try not let you down!

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Amethyst's avatar

While reading your writing, I find myself wanting to go back and re-read. Intuitively, I understand, yet difficult to articulate. It’s a strange thing to go back, read and put some glue to connect my own abstract thinking.

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